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  • Smoking will kill you....

  • So my right patella broke, causing me to be wheelchair-bound and lose control/use of most of my lower body....

  • So today the Anaesthetist told me that he could put me under for the operation either with gas or by knocking me out with a large paddle....

  • Someone has beaten cancer....

  • Someone just called my phone, sneezed then hung......

  • Something about checking my own pulse creeps me out....

  • Something funny about that vaccine I got in......

  • Teaching children about fungus....

  • The amount of money I get paid for work makes me sick....

  • The anatomy professor goes up to the lectern and says, "today we'll be discussing the liver, the kidney and the spleen....

  • The bottom line......

  • The doctor called and said I have atrophy......

  • The doctor called Mrs Goldstein to tell her that her cheque came back....

  • The doctor gave me some cream for my skin rash....

  • The doctor said I have the peek-a-boo virus....

  • The FDA has recalled a batch of dandruff shampoo because it has tiny worms in it....

  • The first rule of Alzheimers club,......

  • The flu....

  • The giant "IV" on the sign for the movie sequel came loose and fell on a guy, and everyone was so surprised except me....

  • The lady at my job asked me if......

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