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I was lonely so I bought some shares......
I was looking to buy the finest yardstick on the market....
I was lost in the wilderness....
I was made to walk the plank as a child....
I was mugged by a guy wearing sunglasses and a pink rabbit suit who hit me with his drumsticks....
I was named after my grandfather......
I was never very good at haggling....
I was once a toll-booth worker....
I was once asked where I see myself......
I was once attempted a cross-country marathon in......
I was once bowled over by an inanimate......
I was once hit on the head with......
I was once kidnapped by mimes....
I was once very popular on a social media website for concrete workers....
I was out to eat and sat near a kid who burped 144 times....
I was playing guitar in my first ever gig,....
I was practicing my aim and hit the bullseye....
I was really drunk the other day, so I took the bus home and left my car at the bar....
I was riding my bike yesterday when a couple punks came up and knocked me to the ground, then took my bicycle and laughed at me as they ran off....
I was robbed by two huge Swedes......
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