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  • Someone stole the wheels off of all the police cars....

  • Spent two hours last night being questioned about the murder of a local prostitute....

  • Starting a pop punk band who specialises in WW1 songs....

  • story time:...

  • Sundays are always a little sad......

  • Super heroes......

  • The accountant was fired from his Kitchen...

  • The actors' strike is bad, but the stand-up comedian strike is going to be worse....

  • The atoms of which element kept disappearing from the periodic table?...

  • The bakery employees told me to stop trying to steal baking utensils or I'd go to jail....

  • The best gift I ever received was a broken drum....

  • The Cairo police arrested King Tut today....

  • The carrots muscled their way to the top of the vegetable world....

  • The CEO of the Titan was known to regularly play bands like Nirvana and Mudhoney for his passengers during their journey....

  • The chair broke underneath me as we were doing our mealtime prayers....

  • The circus owner told the human cannonball that he was terminated right as they were lighting the fuse....

  • The coach went to the bank......

  • The county road worker denied the allegations that he stole from his job....

  • The difference between a lazy person and a curious person can be just a single click....

  • The Energizer Bunny got arrested...

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