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  • Made my wife a cheese dip today......

  • Man sleeping next to a bull......

  • Many people thought Cleopatra was ugly....

  • Mary:...

  • Matthew Perry drowned in his hot tub....

  • Me and the kids went to a masquerade party dressed as parts of a skateboard but it wasn't very exciting....

  • Me, my brother, and his son were out......

  • Me:...

  • Me:...

  • Measured my sit bones today for all of posterity....

  • Menstruation jokes aren't funny!...

  • Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on...

  • Monica's out......

  • Mop......

  • Most bald men still have a comb....

  • Most bald people still own a comb....

  • Most guillotine victims had their heads......

  • Most people don't realize you're actually born with four kidneys....

  • Most people think a Yeti with a six-pack is a cooler....

  • My 5year old daughter just told me this one....

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