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  • I can't plan more than seven days ahead....

  • I caught many fish with one worm......

  • I couldn't catch the thief on the stairs......

  • I didn't want to install backup cameras on my car,....

  • I don't like working as an elevator operator......

  • I donate 25 percent of my paycheck to......

  • I dropped a vacuum cleaner down a deep hole with water in it....

  • I finally got my paintball license this morning......

  • I gave fly fishing a shot once....

  • I got a belt made of watches......

  • I got a dart board installed on my ceiling....

  • I got a job as a church comedian......

  • I got a job at a bakery...

  • I got a job at a vegetable...

  • I got a new job as a security guard....

  • I got a new job at the Zoo,......

  • I got a new job that requires a lot of travel....

  • I got fired from the bank today......

  • I got hired by wired......

  • I got home from work today to find......

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