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My shower curtain talks too much when the water is hot....
My son asked me to turn up the heat!...
My son got a fever and started claiming that he sees dead people....
My son read the thermostat....
My son wanted to eat his ice cream......
My vegetarian girlfriend from New Jersey got mad at me and started yelling at me....
My wife booked us a dinner reservation for a new bbq joint that sits on a rooftop patio 40 stories high....
My wife had to travel to Antarctica for her job....
My wife is so hot!...
My wife keeps asking me to blow cool......
My wife makes me wear YETI hats and shirts....
My wife said she was really cold....
My wife sleeps naked because our room is too hot....
Name a day of the week that...
Not actually a joke, but one of my......
One of my earliest memories is seeing my mother's face through the oven window....
Oops!...
Our hot water system was on the fritz......
Patient:...
Quietest place I ever lived was above a bowling alley....
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