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"Let me show you my cutest bowl ever!...
"Look", said the geologist, "I don't care what you've heard....
"May ya live just as long as ya want, and not want for as long as ya live," is an Irish toast....
"My extra winter weight is finally gone....
"My eyes are bigger than my stomach" is a normal thing to hear at a buffet....
"Siri, why am I still single?...
"Son, next to this exact tree here in our backyard is the perfect place to let your frustrations out....
"The Knickerbockers and Blazers are likely partners for a Damian Lillard trade....
"This is the police, open up"......
"What do you want for your birthday?...
"What's it like outside?...
"When one door closes, another one opens....
"Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock?...
(Pointing at some modelling material from daughter's arts and crafts supplies) "Hey....
[NSFW] "Free Porn" search engine......
*Nurse hands me my new born* 'I am......
1800kars4kids......
2 ducks walked into a bar......
3 women are on a bench eating an ice cream....
3,026 years from now, life will be either really good or really bad....
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