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  • How do conductors get in shape?...

  • How do you eat a steam locomotive?...

  • How does a cyclist train for a race ?...

  • How is a dog that's been trained to shake like a guy that comes up to us and screams the sky is falling?...

  • How is a Serial Killer like a Train Station?...

  • I asked the lady next to me on the train today why she was shoving gummy bears into her eyes....

  • I finished my month-long training at the Acme sponge factory....

  • I got a new DeLorean......

  • I had an argument with my personal trainer over how much he wanted me to lift....

  • I had to quit my job as a......

  • I hate it when people eat loudly on a train!...

  • I hate people who eat loudly on trains......

  • I have a fear of Elevators......

  • I have a mass transit idea for fingers!...

  • I have decided to quit my job as a personal trainer, because the weights are too heavy....

  • I just quit my job as a gym personal trainer because the weights were too heavy....

  • I just signed up for a 401K......

  • I lost my ticket and so I wasn't allowed to get on any train leaving my local station until I could show them my hair was made to be fully covered in tight, neat curls....

  • I meant to write a few jokes about trains earlier today....

  • I met a man on the subway this afternoon with a bounty on his head....

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