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  • If the USA is the greatest country on earth....

  • If USA is so great......

  • If you call your friend Amber and...

  • If you can't laugh at yourself ....

  • If you print "This Page is Left Intentionally Blank" on a page....

  • If you smash a calculator......

  • If you spell the word drawer backwards....

  • If you thought Bruce and his son Brandon......

  • If you urinate a lot....

  • If you want to change the world, do it while you're single....

  • If you write a second autobiography....

  • If you write a second book about electric bicycles....

  • If you write a third book about Birdsong....

  • If you write three intensely suspenseful, interconnected novels....

  • If you're feeling lonely......

  • If you're having a bad day remember......

  • Ill save you the backstory......

  • Important thing about jokes....

  • In 1978, amateur astrophysicists Frederick Mercury and...

  • In addition to anti-matter and dark matter, it seems a new scientific discovery has been made ....

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