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I ate too many chickpeas and now I don't feel so good....
I bought a ceiling fan the other...
I bought a new tin opener. It...
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer....
I bought this new, expensive sunscreen the other day....
I broke up with my cyborg girlfriend today......
I call my wife "Snickers"......
I called into work this morning, and explained......
I called my 14 year old daughter a......
I called the tinnitus hotline yesterday....
I came home from work and saw...
I could never be a kleptomania victim...
I couldn't resist......
I decided to free my imaginary horse, but then he went crazy....
I despise all these jokes about the titanic sub....
I devoured an entire wheel of Swiss cheese today....
I don't always Whoop, but when I do....
I don't do cocaine....
I don't get the appeal for chemistry jokes....
I don't like it when inmates record anions....
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