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  • If you ever meet a Vietnamese veterinarian....

  • If you ever see one of those fish that dies after breeding, feel lucky....

  • If you find yourself going through Hell...

  • If you get a tattoo on your boobs......

  • If you go to the bakery and the only loaf of bread left is shaped like a cow, what do you tell yourself to make you feel better about buying it?...

  • If you leave a spoon alone in a......

  • If you like using bidets, that's fine, but I don't need to hear about your bathroom habits....

  • If you love Christmas so much why don't you Merry it?...

  • If you make a 14-year-old wait for 5 minutes....

  • If you notice someone's feeling crappy......

  • If you oppose having a higher initial bet for your parent's sister, are you....

  • If you rearrange the letters of POSTMEN......

  • If you see something horrible....

  • If you seen one highway sign too many....

  • If you stare into the abyss,....

  • If you think today, Thursday is depressing....

  • If you think your chicken coop is haunted....

  • If you urinate a lot....

  • If you want to scare the crap out of someone, hide arrows in their shoes....

  • If you were born in September, it's pretty......

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