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If you write a second autobiography....
If you write three intensely suspenseful, interconnected novels....
If you're an American, are you still an American when you use the toilet?...
If you're feeling down, try drinking a pint of water before going to bed....
If you're feeling lonely......
If you're having a bad day remember......
If you're having a bad day, try thinking about the absolute value....
If you're in France, wake up at 22:...
If you're sharing a bunkbed with a policeman,......
If you're thinking about changing your last name to Powers....
If you're too scared to count in German, I have some advice....
If your child refuses to take a nap......
If your dad isn't interesting, then find out if he enjoys taking naps....
If your name is Wayne, you better make......
If your spouse sucked 100's of dicks before they met you, is that a big deal?...
Im a Canadian who recently immigrated to USA and it drives me crazy that kids at school here think Canadians tend to apologize first during a conflict....
Im really hesitant on buying a gun......
Im taking measures to save my marriage....
Im tired of all these jokes about the titanic submarine....
Im very afraid for the calendar......
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