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  • "If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me....

  • "interesting" friend......

  • "It's all coming back to me now" said the man with amnesia....

  • "Junior, why do you keep posting pics of my Model S on r/teslamotors?...

  • "Kids, did you know that I met...

  • "Knock Knock?...

  • "Mary Jayne's Last Dance" is my favorite Tom......

  • "Mom, you are drawing your eyebrows too high....

  • "My friend urinated everywhere when he met his favourite rapper....

  • "My girlfriend told me I ruined her...

  • "My mom is upset at me," said Henry....

  • "Please don't cut me down I'm a talking tree!...

  • "please, have mercy!...

  • "Sir!...

  • "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old....

  • "Some phoned me earlier saying they'd lost their throwing stick....

  • "Someone stole the P from Pirate" "Oh, was he mad?...

  • "Son, next to this exact tree here in our backyard is the perfect place to let your frustrations out....

  • "Tell me about life in the eighties," said my son....

  • "Thanks putting up with me!...

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