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My wife is sleeping in the spare bedroom because she said she has had enough of my night time Elvis impersonations....
My wife is so hot!...
My wife is so negative....
My wife just asked me if the outfit she tried on made her look fat....
My wife just gave birth today and after thanking the doctor, I pulled him aside and sheepishly asked, 'How soon do you think we'll be able to have sex?...
My wife just ran away with my best......
My wife just told me that this isn't......
My wife keeps asking me if I'm all......
My wife keeps asking me to blow cool......
My wife keeps complaining about how much she misses me....
My wife keeps sending me texts that say 'love ya'....
My wife keeps telling me to lose the mustache but I'm not sure if I want to....
My wife kicked me out of the house......
My wife laughed at me when I said......
My wife left me because I'm too insecure and paranoid....
My wife left me because of my obsession with Nirvana....
My wife left me because she didn't think......
My wife left me due to my obsession......
My wife left me, saying I'm too old and too obsessed with tennis....
My wife left the medicine bottle open on the counter and the dogs running around....
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