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  • My 4 year old can't say "Please" in Spanish....

  • My 9 year old daughter got me with this one:...

  • My acting career ended the same way my fisherman career ended....

  • My addiction has gotten so bad....

  • My African girlfriend and I sadly broke up last night....

  • My apple juice got drunk......

  • My aunts and uncles have forced me to sign a contract to study English grammar....

  • My barber and I broke up....

  • My best friend and her girlfriend gifted me a Rolex for my birthday....

  • My best friend gambled away his mattresses......

  • My bike doesn't want to work any more......

  • My birthday cake basically turned into a rock......

  • My black friend made a joke and I......

  • My boss sacked me for joining the queue......

  • My boss said I'm the most counterproductive employee here....

  • My boss told me to stop using big words....

  • My boss wants to have a meeting with me this Friday....

  • My boyfriend asked me to stop making so many tree puns....

  • My brother and I always had really untidy hair....

  • My brother broke up with Ruth a month......

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