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  • I once started a dating site for chickens......

  • I once told a joke to a boxer......

  • I once tried to tell my mailman a joke about unpostmarked mail....

  • I once witnessed an argument between two...

  • I ordered a book called "How to scam people"....

  • I passed school many years ago, but I only found about "Cervix" today....

  • I posted my resume on LinkedIn Park......

  • I promised my daughter that she could always ask me for anything and I would never say no....

  • I pushed an Asian guy down the stairs......

  • I quit my job as a bus driver for the paranoid society because....

  • I quit my job at the parsley farm....

  • I realized it's out of my control....

  • I really hate professional wrestling, it is absolutely the worst thing on TV....

  • I really hate them hippy shops!...

  • I really wanna get back at the guy who pushed me causing me to fall and break my tailbone....

  • I Rear Ended Someone This Morning......

  • I recentantly found an unbeatabe present......

  • I recently got in trouble for bartering alcoholic beverages to quaint hotels....

  • I recently launched a series of books targeted at young adults....

  • I recently wrote a document in Word, but my colleague changed a lot of the paragraph formatting....

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