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  • My doctor said I'm not getting enough REM sleep....

  • My doctor told me one of my organs is practicing kung fu....

  • My dog ate a whole bag of Scrabble......

  • My dog ate a whole set of Scrabble tiles....

  • My drinking buddy, a private, called his projectile a bullet....

  • My dying friend wants me to find him that famous RPG about clouds....

  • My ex wife tried to upset me by......

  • My ex-girlfriend always liked to beat me at paint ball....

  • My family was looking kind of sad during a game of Scrabble, so lighten the mood I stood up on the board and started quoting Hamlet....

  • My favorite hobby is stabbing clocks and watches....

  • My first football game....

  • My first serve in tennis was poor....

  • My flock of sheep were at the top of the ridge when it gave way....

  • My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles...

  • My friend and I debated whether it's OK to write on the back of a piece of paper....

  • My friend and I don't talk about fencing anymore....

  • My friend and I have been playing cards with a deck that's missing a suit....

  • My friend ate all the scrabble pieces....

  • My friend blocked me for posting too much bird content, I'm ok with it but....

  • My friend blocked me on Facebook because he thinks I use too many bird puns....

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