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My girlfriend told me that if i make......
My grandma asked me "How far do you think I can kick this bucket?...
My guitar and I are not on speaking terms....
My half brother and I....
My heater and stove have been acting up for months and I smell a leak, but every time the gas company comes to look they say nothing is wrong....
My housekeeper has been stealing from me but I can't seem to catch her in the act....
My husband left me because of my gambling addiction....
My job is hard....
My kid accidentally fell asleep yesterday on a bunch of jigsaw tiles....
My kids always have trouble putting Lego Minifigures together....
My kids and I like to play catch with a clock....
My kids figured out how to start using my dad jokes on me....
My kids just told me that I own every board game except one....
My kids keep wanting to upgrade to the latest video game system JUST so they can play the latest and greatest Football video game....
My kids missed me today....
My landlady threatened to evict the tenant with......
My landlord said that he will be evicting the tenant with the worst posture....
My least favorite letter is O....
My local gun club was thinking about building a blast proof wall so we can set off grenades and other explosives....
My mom has one of those Google Nest mini things but it doesn't work right....
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