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  • "Honey, will you be pan frying the bacon for breakfast this morning?...

  • "How was the surgery?...

  • "How you feeling after the vasectomy Bob?...

  • "I asked my wife if I was...

  • "I don't trust those trees....

  • "I feel like a kid again!...

  • "I had a Russian Uber driver the other day....

  • "I see" said the blind man......

  • "I told my wife she should embrace...

  • "I'll call you later....

  • "If you have bare feet you have to put on shoes....

  • "interesting" friend......

  • "Is there any favouritism where you work?...

  • "Just me" jokes......

  • "Listen up GIRLS:...

  • "Mary Jayne's Last Dance" is my favorite Tom......

  • "May ya live as long as ya want, and not want for as long as ya live" is an Irish toast....

  • "May ya live just as long as ya want, and not want for as long as ya live," is an Irish toast....

  • "Mrs....

  • "My eyes are bigger than my stomach" is a normal thing to hear at a buffet....

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