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  • I have all my dead batteries away today....

  • I have an ancient Egyptian gold coin....

  • I have bad news....

  • I have been a limo driver for 25 years and haven't had a single customer....

  • I have been bitten by a recluse spider....

  • I have been diagnosed with multiple personality disorder....

  • I have decided to quit my job as a personal trainer, because the weights are too heavy....

  • I have fond memories of the vineyard I once worked at turning grapes in to wine....

  • I have never had amnesia....

  • I have so much debt....

  • I haven't talked to my wife in 3 weeks....

  • I haven't talked to my wife in 7 years....

  • I hear even gas station air pumps have been hit by inflation....

  • i heard a man was arrested today after......

  • I heard about a guy who's left half......

  • I heard buying spiders became illegal......

  • I heard goku was a big solo fan......

  • I heard Mississippi has the highest rate of poverty and is 4th highest in adultery in the US....

  • I heard naps are banned in Florida....

  • I heard of a movie that has no sound in the finale....

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