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  • I was about to put my card into the machine to pay for my blow up doll....

  • I was addicted to the hockey pockey......

  • I was at Best Buy looking at the computers when I was approached by an employee....

  • I was behind someone at an ATM who asked me "Could you check my balance?...

  • I was calling for my wife but then the washing machine made a sound....

  • I was devastated when I got home from shopping to find my wife had left me....

  • I was gassing up my Honda Accord and a snarky Tesla owner asked me how much I spend on gas....

  • I was getting so frustrated trying to use a broken calculator that I almost threw it across the room, but I decided not to....

  • I was going to make a belt out......

  • I was going to tell some jokes about ski resorts....

  • I was hoping to go to the gym......

  • I was in a fight with a Lego man the other day....

  • I was passed by a chocolate doing 90mph......

  • I was planning to get into yo-yo's but......

  • I was skeptical about the magician until he turned me into a giant windmill....

  • I was so angry about my computer that I ripped out its GPU and smashed it....

  • I was so confused last night, as my printer was playing music....

  • I was trying to figure out how to......

  • I was trying to make a fluid mechanics......

  • I was walking down the aisle in Harbor......

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