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  • Just opened 3 birthday cards and I'm $150 up!...

  • Just paid $200 for a belt that doesn't fit....

  • Just paid $400 for new tennis gear......

  • Just spent a lot of money building a......

  • King Tut once started a charity where woman got tattoos on their breasts for donations and all the proceeds went to feeding poor children....

  • Last time I was sick my wife bought......

  • Local Rabi...

  • Looking to hire someone to change the channel and volume on my tv....

  • Mark says to John, "Can you believe that an Arab millionaire saw my wife and told me that he would pay her weight in gold?...

  • Mark Zuckerberg and Elon Musk are going to fight each other in a steel cage....

  • McDonald's says they have served over 99 billion....

  • McDonalds tried to increase prizes thinking it would......

  • MF DOOM joke I just made up....

  • Money aside, what do you need right now?...

  • Money has to grow on trees....

  • Money talks......

  • Moved to Portland and started giving the things I didn't need to charity....

  • My 10 year old son, who will inherit my fortune and take over my company when I'm gone, said he wants to be an astronaut....

  • My autopsy club is having an open mike night next week!...

  • My bank account is addicted to money....

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