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  • I just opened my water bill and electricity bill at the same time....

  • I just published a new pruning guide for houseplants....

  • I just read "The Frog Prince"......

  • I just read a book about a man......

  • I just read a study that found humans eat more bananas....

  • I just read about a Hollywood actor who is always ready to eat cereal for every meal....

  • I just read about the triplet arsonists....

  • I just read an exciting book about theme......

  • I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds....

  • I just read that the Norwegian military is planning on putting barcodes on all of their ships....

  • I just went through a long audit at the IRS....

  • I keep a copy of the book I wrote taped to my body....

  • I keep forgetting that letter between X and Z....

  • I keep forgetting where one of my friends graduated university, do you know what i asked him?...

  • I keep getting emails from Hormel in regards......

  • I knew a girl who wore pants so......

  • I knew a woman who was plus size, a polyglot, and on the cover of magazines for her beauty, despite her having amnesia from the past couple years....

  • I knew a woman who was plus size, a polyglot, and on the cover of magazines for her beauty, despite her having amnesia from the past couple years....

  • I know a library that has two stories....

  • I know a lot of jokes about retired......

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