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  • I got my STD results back......

  • I got on a moving staircase and was......

  • I got rich packaging consumable atmosphere modules....

  • I got sick after I swallowed a hundred......

  • I got tazed yesterday....

  • I got trapped in an elevator once....

  • I had a bad sandwich the other day....

  • I had a happy childhood, my dad used to roll me down hills in tyres....

  • I had a joke about a tyre......

  • I had a lower-back problem for years......

  • I had an appointment to see my...

  • I had an infection and went to the doctor....

  • I had surgery on one of my joints way before it was cool....

  • I had the craziest dream that I was an F5 function key....

  • I had to break up with my console today....

  • I had to cancel the appointment with...

  • I had to quit my job at the gym because I couldn't lift enough....

  • I hate all these Titanic jokes....

  • I hate average men......

  • I hate clocks......

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