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  • My new diet is really working, I only had 2 carbs today!...

  • My new gf and I found a staircase for giants with risers as tall as me....

  • My new job at the jewelry store isn't going so well....

  • My new love potion only works on people......

  • My new puppy Ella has a new nickname....

  • My new puppy wakes up from his fart, starts barking, then falls back asleep....

  • My new racing game keeps crashing......

  • My new sensei is non binary....

  • My new Siamese cats are talking all the......

  • My next door neighbour has just blown up a Lenin statue....

  • My next door neighbour worships exhaust pipes....

  • My nice draws my attention to a...

  • My niece just heard her first pun......

  • My niece was the only girl student in her class of engineering....

  • My nookie days are over My pilot light is out What used to be my sex appeal Is now my water spout....

  • My old brother keeps eating all my papers....

  • My old shoes didn't protect the bottom of......

  • My one-armed friend and I go to the......

  • My ophthalmologist explained to me the fascinating initial steps of my upcoming cataracts surgery....

  • My orchid is pregnant and we don't know who the father is....

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