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  • My jokes age like milk....

  • My neighbor's front door is made of sponge....

  • My neighbor's girlfriend left him because of his obsession with pasta....

  • My new love potion only works on people......

  • My nose is a racing athlete....

  • My office building janitor declined to smoke weed......

  • My potato soup was spilling all over the......

  • My son asked Santa for Italian pastries for Christmas....

  • My son picked his nose and wiped it on me....

  • My son was looking for mushrooms at the farmers market....

  • My toast really loves me......

  • My toilet's clogged......

  • My uncle loves drinking, so for his birthday,......

  • My weed biscuits have expired....

  • My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives....

  • My wife and I decided that the key......

  • My wife apparently thinks I should stop talking about philosophy near the trash can....

  • My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list....

  • My wife asked me what she should call......

  • My wife asked why I'd hung bunches of grapes up to dry all round the house....

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