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Out of nowhere, my daughter smacked me in the face with her lollipop....
Overheard at work:...
Ozzy Osbourne's death is only a hoax....
Paddy and Mick take a shortcut home through a farmers field....
Panicking after I accidentally fed my vegan friend......
Papa, papa, what are you watching?...
Parties with ghosts are always fun!...
Patient: Doctor, doctor. I've come out in...
Paul Reuben's Favorite Dad Joke......
Peer support group for CEOs is called......
Pennywise only failed because he stopped to eat the fat kid....
People always seem to get offended....
People always tell me I'm condescending....
People are usually shocked when they find out......
People ask me how I feel about being......
People cringe when I show up in eccentric......
People cringe when they see my outfit......
People enjoy new car smell......
People get vocally angry when I tell them......
People go on and on about their phobias......
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