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  • Today I got a letter of rejection from origami college....

  • Today I lost a paper airplane....

  • Today I met some of Bruce Lee's...

  • Today I purchased an inexpensive watering tube....

  • Today I really screwed Up......

  • Today I rescued a new pup from the kennel....

  • Today i returned my wife's new glasses....

  • Today I saw a midget climbing down a......

  • Today I threw a cheese grater at my son, and he ran away....

  • Today I watched Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume 3....

  • Today I went to a Birthday Party that I was dreading by riding on the roof of my Honda....

  • Today I'm really fed up of babysitting....

  • Today is my 2 year old niece's day......

  • Today is not the day for OJ Simpson......

  • Today is Super Bowl Sunday, so I'm in a good mood....

  • Today is the best day ever....

  • Today is the first day of spring in the US....

  • Today is the worst day of the year......

  • Today my 11 year old son asked me for a Bookmark....

  • Today my boss asked me to put a joke on the first slide of the presentation....

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