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  • I've developed a fetish for figuring things out....

  • I've finally found my path in life!...

  • I've given up asking rhetorical questions....

  • I've got a great joke about construction,......

  • I've got a joke about 288 but I......

  • I've got a small mischievous creature in my blood....

  • I've got a son who can't say please......

  • I've got to stop turning up early for concerts....

  • I've had an addiction to break fluid for......

  • I've had it up to here with jokes....

  • I've just celebrated my thirty second birthday!...

  • I've just designed a suit to prevent bird attacks....

  • I've just heard the window cleaner shouting...

  • I've just muted all irrelevant subreddits showing up on my home feed ....

  • I've just released my own personalised fragrance......

  • I've just started a business recycling chewing gum......

  • I've just watched Guardians of The Galaxy:...

  • I've just won the local Lazy Award again....

  • I've lost my compass....

  • I've made it a habit to not to......

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