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  • "Mom, the dryer is shrinking my clothes....

  • "My good friend, when is your birthday?...

  • "My mom is upset at me," said Henry....

  • "Please don't cut me down I'm a talking tree!...

  • "please, have mercy!...

  • "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old....

  • "Someone stole the P from Pirate" "Oh, was he mad?...

  • "Stop being a closed book....

  • "This is a very dense cake!...

  • "To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft...

  • "Was it you that put ice in my wife's underwear?...

  • "Watson!...

  • "What are these pennies doing in my soup?...

  • "Who's in for bringing back roman numerals?...

  • "Why are you calling me Archibald?...

  • "You can't cut me down," the tree said to the lumberjack....

  • (Dark humor warning)What did the Lesbian Pirate with two peg legs say to Her Girlfriend?...

  • (In an alternate universe made of anti-matter)......

  • (OC) why did the congressman have such a hard time after his wife suddenly left him?...

  • [OC] What did gandalf say to the idiot sandwich lady?...

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