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  • I think someone else has been sleeping in my bed, but it's tough to find evidence....

  • I think the government should provide a lot......

  • I think they should get the Arctic Monkeys to rebuild The Crooked house!...

  • I thought I could use my fireplace to......

  • I thought I won the argument with my wife about how to arrange our dining room furniture....

  • I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture....

  • I told a guy "what's upstairs?...

  • I told my carpenter I didn't want carpeted steps....

  • I told my dad......

  • I told my plumber that I gotta leak......

  • I told my solar installer that I wasn't......

  • I told my wife that we should put a tepee in our backyard with colored lights....

  • I told the contractor that I didn't want any carpet on the stairs....

  • I tried making a candlelit dinner....

  • I tried to think of a carpentry joke......

  • I tried to turn on my wife tonight......

  • I used to have three guns in my......

  • I used to wear camo pants to the......

  • I walked into a room with a bunch......

  • I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford....

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