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I saw some guy dip his testicles in......
I saw this girl with tattoos of a......
I sleep like a modern plumbing system......
I slept like a baby last night....
I sometimes get worried about my butt-plug usage......
I spent a small fortune on my circumcision......
I spent the last 12 hours welding together a belt using nothing but wrist watches, and it came out 10 sizes too big....
I sprained my ankle tripping over a box of Kleenex....
I stepped on frozen poop this morning....
i stole a kilt while i was in......
I suffered a grievous injury in Paris....
I survived falling from 12 story building....
I think i am getting a sun burn on my head....
I think i might have Tuberculosis but I'm......
I think my girlfriend is a 10 but......
I thought of dressing up as a Band Aid for Halloween....
I told a joke about a chair with......
I told a joke to a skeleton in......
I told my boss I have anal glaucoma......
I told my cannibal girlfriend that I liked her pants....
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