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  • I once worked in a hospital where a......

  • I once worked in a small, family-owned Indian restaurant....

  • I once worked on a lobster boat......

  • I only did a 4 year contract in the military working with artillery....

  • I only had Hostess snack cakes with me when I had to force feed a young sheep to eat....

  • I only joined the Liars Academy yesterday....

  • I only trust pilots who are licensed...

  • I opened a magnet store that was too......

  • I opened a new furniture store......

  • I ordered a vault and a speaker...

  • I ordered food at a sushi restaurant....

  • I organize houses for blonde women....

  • I paid a guy to map out a......

  • I politely asked the surgeon if he minded......

  • I programmed a new pirates game....

  • I pulled a sickie yesterday......

  • I put laxatives in my dishwasher last night....

  • I put the internet router into the barn....

  • I put together a new drum set......

  • I quit my job as a bus driver for the paranoid society because....

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