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  • I ordered a book called "How to scam people"....

  • I ordered this book online titled "How To......

  • I quit my terrible job at the candy store....

  • I read a book about World War II that was only four pages long....

  • I read a mediocre book about ancient Mongolian leaders....

  • I really don't see a whole lot...

  • I really want to tell an inappropriate joke about my dad's penis....

  • I recently decided to stop talking to my......

  • I recently joined a support group for people who talk a lot....

  • I recently launched a series of books targeted at young adults....

  • I recently ran a marathon in northern Sweden......

  • I recently started a business building yachts in my attic....

  • I recently tried to write a book...

  • I remember when 3D came out, and now we have 4K....

  • I request my vacations be taken during winter time....

  • I said "mucho" to my Spanish friend......

  • I said to my wife, "For the last 15 years, all you've done is find mistakes in anything I say....

  • I saw a microbiologist today....

  • I saw online that there's a lot of......

  • I sent my hearing aids away to be......

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