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  • The coin press at the federal mint has......

  • The cost of balloons has risen....

  • The doctor called Mrs Goldstein to tell her that her cheque came back....

  • The finance company called to ask why I hadn't made a payment yet....

  • The guy at the liquor store asked if I needed help....

  • The guy next door is selling stolen goods, but I don't mind....

  • The guy who invented Ovaltine made loads of......

  • The HR lady from work tried to get me to sign up for a 401k....

  • The jukebox didn't play my song......

  • The Kardashians must have descended from pirates......

  • The Lions are finally going to the Super Bowl!...

  • The local church's organ broke and they needed a new, so they asked for donations....

  • The local funeral home just raised its prices....

  • The local upholstery supplier went bust....

  • The new "fully clothed" strip club went bankrupt after only a month....

  • The price of everything is so high these......

  • The story of Juan......

  • The tills in Aldi went down last week so they swapped all the cashiers with Oompa-loompas....

  • The U....

  • The United States is going to start minting pennies next year that will have a joke on the front with the answer on back....

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