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  • I just started my job as an executioner....

  • I just tripped over my wife's bra....

  • I keep trying to get people to stop using inappropriate phrases....

  • I killed my wife by putting lead coins in her Christmas desert....

  • I knew a guy that would pick a......

  • I knew a woman who set fire to all her outstanding bills....

  • I know a murderer in Kingston upon Hull......

  • I know it's a long shot....

  • I know Ryan Reynolds plays Deadpool but I......

  • I know this dude and we're really close, but sometimes I can't deal with all the crap he puts out....

  • I learned alot from my uncle,......

  • I like Lunar New Year....

  • I like to listen to really dark...

  • I live in such a sketchy neighborhood that we don't let our kids out the house after 7 p....

  • I lost control of my car and crashed......

  • I lost my job at the bank today....

  • I lost my job in a packaging factory, after I asked my foreman where to put the huge roll of bubblewrap I was carrying....

  • I lost my watch at a party once....

  • I made a huge mistake challenging Death to a pillow fight....

  • I made sure my Mexican friend took his......

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