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(Soon to be parents couple) Wife:...
(True story) When our pans get old and worn out I ask my wife if I should retire them to the pan-tree....
[m31] I play the worlds most dangerous sport....
[TRUE STORY] I pointed out the car window and said "Everyone look, there should be a very old Sharpie in that field somewhere....
*Nurse hands me my new born* 'I am......
1600s Britain......
A 911 dispatcher receives a call......
A couple have not been getting along for years, so the husband thinks, "I'll buy my wife a cemetery plot for her birthday....
A couple weeks ago, my wife surprised me by replacing all of our carpeting with wood....
A Day Off......
A farmer's wife left him after she found him having sex with one of the ponies after she went to sleep....
A guy said everything to the judge and relaxed....
A huisband told his wife a fun fact:...
A husband and wife had a big argument....
A husband is talking to his wife about their Christmas party....
A husband surprises his wife with a room......
A husband-and-wife team are opening a new coffee shop that will also serve as a family law practice....
A kind old lady next door offered me a large , blue waterproof sheet for free....
A lady is checking out the organic eggs at the grocery....
A man answers the phone and hears......
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