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  • I walked out of a lecture about singularities......

  • I walked up to my boss, pushed them out of their chair, sat in their chair, and said "I'm the boss now!...

  • I wanted a detailed report on lipstick from the vendor....

  • I wanted to become an HVAC expert, but the colleagues mocked me all the time....

  • I wanted to get an estimate for...

  • I wanted to live by the seaside but couldn't afford it....

  • I wanted to start a reddit community about underwater transport....

  • I was a little short on rent, so I tried to pay the rest in tangled ropes....

  • I was a real ladies' man in my......

  • I was attacked by a flock of sheep......

  • I was challenged to name at least one European philosopher....

  • I was dating a girl named Ruth but I broke up with her....

  • I was driving to work when a bunch......

  • I was fired......

  • I was furious when I wanted breakfast but didn't have any bread....

  • I was getting chased by a dog,......

  • I was getting in line at the DMV for license renewal but the tenant said I was in the wrong line....

  • I was getting tired of hooking up with this woman I met through a dating app for cannibals....

  • I was going to tell a joke about sword fighting techniques....

  • I was going to tell you a joke about boxing....

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