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  • I shot a 10 on hole four today....

  • I should have dealt with my obsession with reducing fractions a long time ago....

  • I started a band called 999 megabytes......

  • I started a new band, we are called......

  • I started going to the gym to lift......

  • I still don't know the difference between e^x......

  • I struggle with Roman numerals until I get to 159....

  • I survived falling from 12 story building....

  • I tell everyone my wife is 12......

  • I text my wife "Look, if plans A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, and J don't work, then we'll have to resort to Plan K....

  • I think I might start a clothing company......

  • I think my girlfriend is a 10 but......

  • I think we're all wrong....

  • I thought up a math joke....

  • I told a joke about fractions....

  • I told my Dad that I got a......

  • I told my wife I was pretty angry about the low number of toads in my life....

  • I told my wife that she looks like she's 763941....

  • I took a pole and found that....

  • I took some pesto bismol at the casino......

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