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I was happy to raise my kid on my own, until his mother, my ex-wife burned our house down....
I was having a problem with drunks walking around my neighborhood causing trouble....
I was in a fight with a Lego man the other day....
I was in Hong Kong......
I was jumped in the alley by a gang of 25 cent pieces....
I was kidnapped by a cheapskate....
I was kidnapped by a group of mimes......
I was kidnapped by a troupe of mimes......
I was kidnapped by mimes once......
I was late to my first fight club today....
I was minding my own business in the library when I was attacked....
I was mugged by a group of 6......
I was mugged by a guy wearing sunglasses and a pink rabbit suit who hit me with his drumsticks....
I was on the radio once....
I was once hit on the head with......
I was once kidnapped by mimes....
I was out hiking yesterday when all of a sudden a large pack of what looked like large, wild dogs came stampeding out of the forest and knocked me down and trampled me....
I was practicing my aim and hit the bullseye....
I was riding a donkey across the desert when some bandits jumped me and left me walking penniless and barefoot to town....
I was riding my bike through the countryside when I was attacked by a herd of sheep....
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