Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose.
Are glass coffins popular?
Remains to be seen.
How do you tell if a joke is a Dad joke?
The pun is apparent.
When you have a bladder infection ....
urine trouble.
My mother said I should be a fortune teller...
...but I didn't see any future in it.
An atom walks into a bar...
...goes up to the bar.
The bartender says to the atom, "You look sad. What's up?"
The atom replies, "I lost an electron."
The bartender says, "Are you sure?"
Says the atom, "I'm Positive..."