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I really regret going to the Star Wars themed sex party....
I really want to tell an inappropriate joke about my dad's penis....
I really wasn't looking forward to the...
I received an email about how to read......
I received bad oral sex from my girlfriend last night....
I received subpar alcohol at a Japanese restaurant;...
I received terrible oral sex from my girlfriend last night....
I recently bought a pencil owned by Shakespeare himself!...
I recently bought an aviation themed couch....
I recently broke long-standing ties with my cannibal......
I recently decided to stop talking to my......
I recently made a Weapon of Mass destruction......
I recently ordered a new sail for my boat....
I recently quit my job at the helium factor....
I recently started telling furniture jokes....
I recently won an award that is shaped like a feline's rear end....
I recently wrote a document in Word, but my colleague changed a lot of the paragraph formatting....
I refuse to swarm around to the news......
I refuse to use compost......
I relocated from one apartment to another....
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